I have to admit, I did a very stupid mistake last sem,letting me drop in such a difficult circumstaces now. I have to chase my CGPA so hard this sem. By the time I realise , it was too late as it's about to have my 2nd sem final.
Secondly, my college application. I don't know whether I still have a chance to stay for next sem. I knew that I have participated very few activities in my college. At first, I was reluctant to stay any longer due to bad food choice etc. Somehow, I suddenly feel that it's much more convinient for me to stay in the college. Besides, I haven't achieve what I promised myself in the beginning of my 1st sem. I have nearly forget what I said to myself. I used to tell myself. I must grab this opportunity to mix or work with people of other ethnics since I don't have such chances in the past. However, I'm not sure whether I still can get it. Futhermore, my CGPA. I worried that it will be my obstacles for applying the college for next year.
I'm in a struggle now. I feel like I have betray or "putting aeroplane " on my friend. I used to say I may move out if I can't get the college. Though I have never ever give my friend a very confirm promise that I must move out. I feel guilty an feeling I have done something sorry to her. I may mess up her plan, break down her hope, and bring trouble to her...
Shall apply for other colleges as well for my living assurerance? Shall I try to apply for the PM (Pembantu Mahasiswa) for the sack of increasing my probability of getting to stay in the college again?
Struggle struggle struggle
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